Full stop.

Must be brave and must be strong.
Cannot say what we've known all along..
How can i not love you?
What do i tell my heart?
When do i not want you here in my arms.
How does one walks away from those memories
How do i not miss you when you are gone?
How can i not love youuu?
When you are gone?

I have moved to my new place in Maroubra.
My landlord has yet to set up the internet,
So for the next few days, i am bound to Internet Cafes.
Its just like that in shows,
Whereby u go to an internet cafe in the night,
In a country alone, far away where you used to live.
Sitting in a video store, surrounded by walls and walls of videos.

I wonder if the lonliness will ever get to me so badly that i just do another random shot,
Buy a random ticket online and head back to where i am so protected.
Somewhere where food and shelter is and will never be a problem.
Somewhere where u can just walk out on the streets in the middle of the night.
Hang out late till the wee hours of the morning.
Somewhere when you can just give your friends a call,
"Lets go for supper!"
"Lets go for tea!"
"Lets go for a midnight movie!"
Somewhere where everything is so convenient
And yeah somewhere where its so bloody hot, Singapore.

I miss you so much recently that i can't even start to understand why.
My heart is aching so badly but i can't say it.
Can you even begin where to start understanding how i feel?
I am so tired of feeling this way.
I want to be loved.
Loving is starting to seemingly be too tiring, too draining, too exhausting.

I almost got into an accident today.
Maybe thats why i am so emotional.
Some bloody driver drove past red light.
I had the right of way and was at this kick ass huge intersection and the car just dashed out.
I had to slam brake, jerked so badly in the car.
And i let out an incredibly loud and long hornnnnnnnnn.
The expression of the guy that waiting in the other direction was classic.
His face was contorted, as if he was just about to whip up a camera to snap this accident about to unravel in front of his eyes.
He was stunned and extremely shocked.
I didn't breathe for a few seconds.
Bloody driver, she didn't even look.
Or rather pretended not to look.
Haiz.

Life can be so short.
I know i should not be wallowing like i am currently doing now.
But i cant seem to help it.
Half an hour more till my credits run out.
Life is on a balance.
Its a give and take session.
I am currently extremely thankful for the 2 pple introduced into my life.
Although they started out as friend's friend.
It all turned out well.
Alicia and Aloy.
Although i am almost positive that Aloy likes Alicia.
Which kinda mean that i am a light bulb here, so it kinda sucks.
But with any kinda of company, i seem to be clinging on to it for dear life.

Dancekool(the dance studio) i am currently attending is having a showcase, "Just Dance"
I am so looking forward to never-ending sessions of workouts.
Winter is making me fat!
I am eating and eating and eating.
Haha. Random but its getting cold!
Eating makes u warm.

So my big boss is in town and i need to roll up my socks.
Bitch is still bitching and i wonder when will be the day she gets tired of scolding and shouting at me.
I am tired of listening to it.
It has already come to a pt whereby whatever she says don't deter or affect me anymore.
Its just ok, yeah, sorry.
Half the time i am apologising, i am actually just saying it for the sake of saying so.
To shut her up.
And so, i end up as the "bad guy".
Whatever! And boi am i thankful that i don't sit in the same office with her.

So, getting ready for another day tml.
And please pray that i don't get into an accident.